Top 10 Things You Can Do With Your New ACAS Designation
By Michael Ersevim, Humor Editor (and newly minted ACAS!)
10.) Make other people guess what "ACAS" stands for.
9.) Finally earn enough money during the time you're going for coffee at Starbucks to actually pay for the drink you just ordered.
8.) Serve as "Humor Editor" for The Actuarial Review.
7.) Get a vanity license plate with "ACAS" between your initials. For example, a John (or Jane) Smith might order a plate that says "JACASS."
6.) Make your dream of perpetual study a reality by next applying to medical school.
5.) Enlarge your puny diploma to 400% on the copier in order to "compete" with those who have their oh-so-impressive-looking CPCU diplomas hanging near you.
4.) Flash your CAS membership card to a policeman and speeding tickets are now a thing of the past.
3.) When an 8th degree black belt challenges you to a fight, you can say, "Whoa-back off there, buddy. I must warn you that I have my ACAS designation!"
2.) Enjoy 15% off at participating Radio Shacks.
1.) Stop being taken advantage of by Fellows who work with you by getting them only ONE coffee a day instead of TWO.